Waiting

Waiting in general is tough for me.  Waiting to find out about my little boys medical procedures is really tough.  We don't have any answers yet on what is next for Evan.  We have been waiting all week to find out what surgery Evan will need and when.  I have learned though throughout all of our hospital stays in the last year that waiting when it comes to medical decisions is actually a good thing.  It means you are not considered an emergency in their eyes.  That doesn't make the waiting easier on us, we are still anxious parents, but we know there are other kids that need more attention right now.  Evan is not at any risk right now as long as his blood pressure remains stable with the medication (we have to get it checked 1-2 a week).  Apparently it is quite the process to get everybody on the same page and consult with all of the doctors due to Evan's medical history.  We know the team is thorough and is not rushing into anything, so we will just have to deal with a little more waiting.  The idea of him going into surgery still terrifies me, but there is no need to freak out yet.

For a while now I always wanted to believe that Evan is just a normal healthy little boy, but deep down I always worried that something else could be wrong or that there could still be longterm effects from everything he went through as a newborn.  It was getting easier for me to relax and believe that he is healthy (you really just have to take one look at this little boy and it is hard to believe that he has anything wrong with him) and I hope this setback will be the last bump in the road.