Three Months Update

It is hard to believe that sweet Evan is three months old.  We have all finally adjusted to being home.  He is a pretty happy baby.  He likes to be held (I have yet to meet a baby that doesn't) and likes to sleep in my arms for naps.  He sleeps pretty well in his bassinet at night, but during the day he wants to be held.  Every time I put him down he is up within a few min.  I do not mind holding him!  The Ergo carrier is still his favorite spot for naps.  He just can't help it and falls asleep every time.  He also really likes to be bounced, which has become quite a workout for me (I have actually started doing squats with him in my arms.....it helps him to go to sleep).  

Mornings are his best time and he is very smiley.  It just melts my heart when he smiles at me.  His sister is very good at making him smile too.  Every time he does something new Hannah gets very excited and claps for him and says "Good job cutie buddy".  He is very aware of his surroundings, responds to our voices and is starting to grab objects.  Hannah shows him all of her favorite toys from  "long time ago when she was a kid".  

I have really been able to relax a lot more, but I still worry so much.  I stare at him all the time and just thank God that he is here with us today.  I still picture him with all of the lines, drips and monitors in my head and that just hurts.  His blood pressure was high this week, which has me worried.  We were going to try and start weaning his medications next week, but if it stays this high we will not be able to do that and we don't know what is causing his blood pressure to be high.  I constantly check his profusion and I worry about his hands and feet always being cold and sometimes they look white.  I still get very anxious when he cries really hard, because I worry about his heart and blood pressure.  We go to see the cardiologist again on the 24th and I am ready for that.  I need reassurance from the doctor.  I need him to tell me that Evan is a normal baby now!  Another thing that is constantly on my mind is long term effects.  We don't know if anything he went through or any of the medications could have caused some long term damage.  He is acting like a normal baby, so for right now I just have to trust in that.  

He is such little chunk now and I love it!